yesterday's sunrise

sunrise 
frees the cynical coals flaring
in my heart
blesses the vermillion wounds 
of my soul
speeds  in a blessed contagion 
to forgive

the fragile futures I've outlived

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Pic: Yesterday's sunrise over Mackinaw Island bay. Water and celestial bodies make me so happy! The birds on the water are geese, not swans, but the scene reminded me of Yeats's "The Wild Swans at Coole."

Ugh! Anyway! Onward!

Yesterday, as I packed my toiletries for this trip, I was congratulating myself on my foolproof method (a dedicated travel case with sample sizes, adding stuff like medication, foundation, etc. in as I used it the morning of travel). While getting ready for bed last night, I discovered that I didn't have a single tube of toothpaste or sunscreen or anything as I'd left the whole thing sitting on the bathroom counter.  Pride goeth before a fall, indeed. (I was able to borrow generic toothpaste and blindingly white sunscreen from the fairer-skinned members of my family.)

I got a very nice walk in the early dark with Huck and Max and some lovely pictures at sunrise this morning. Then I woke up Nu and Big A and we got showers and breakfasts and got on the ferry and then on the road before things got too crowded. 

I kept seeing puppies in the clouds on our way home--someone told me that when that happened it was Scout coming to visit... it was certainly a sky full of Scout and his friends today. It's my Boss Day, and Scout always got so excited when people sang the Boss Day song, so it seems apropos. 

When we made the reservations for this trip back in March, we expected to travel with Scout. When I had that t-shirt made with Scout and Huck's pictures on it for Big A last Christmas, little did I know we wouldn't have Scout with us for the next one... How unpredictable life is... it's no wonder I've been having more anxiety attacks lately. Ugh! Anyway! Onward! (I should embroider this somewhere as my motto.)

Pic: On the ferry back from Mackinac Island. I like this picture, because I can see Big A and Nu and me... and also Huck and Max on the floor and Scout's picture on the edge of Big A's t-shirt. (Also, I feel like a shiny insect in these sunglasses. And also, I cut my hair myself just before school started and think I did a good job.)

"island in the sun"

Big A has biked over a hundred miles every day for the past four days, we're doing our part by waiting for him in at a resort on Mackinac Island.

A teensy labor day weekend vacation for us. We've sampled the requisite fudge and taffy, admired the gorgeous views, and smelled the horse poop (cars aren't allowed on the island, so horse-carriage taxis and drayage are the mode).

Vacations are good for everyone. I haven't seen Huck this excited and animated in a while; Max barfed in the car and is afraid of horses, boats, stairs, people who look at him the wrong way, etc. but enjoys each  adventure; Nu has dubbed this "horse-shit island" and has claimed they will never return here, but is full of jokes, confidences, and ideas. I owe an editor a bibliography, but I can find it tomorrow when we're back.

Pic: Lounging: A happy Huck, a mopsy Max, and a nonchalant Nu.

summer retreat

every morning I try to learn
it's my  errand  as the  sun goes blind

I become  the  day's drama

the music of birds; the silence of birds

I've hammered desire into 
some general  theory of dispossession
shredding the faces of flowers
until they become a synonym of before

It is a question of attention

an experiment to re-turn these directions

to trust--quick--desire as true

pause as I pour more love into the world

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Pic: Max discovers the hideout of Kylo, the black squirrel who regularly taunts the puppies. There's a train behind the tree-line too.

a DALMAC house

Big A is doing the DALMAC, the multi-day camping bike tour from Lansing to Mackinaw Island. He left yesterday, and the first stop on the tour is near the town where I teach. It's so silly, but we were SO EXCITED TO MEET at school this morning and I walked him to the water fountain so he could fill his water bottles. We hugged and held hands all the way and then kissed behind a pillar. 

There was practically no one around at 7:50 am, but in retrospect, this still seems silly. I have no idea why we're like this or when we're going to stop being silly and embarrassing.

Pic: A selfie Big A sent me at the start of the ride yesterday. I think he looks so much like his baby picture in this!

until 2037

I heard the next super blue moon will happen in 2037... that seems like a very long wait. I tried (and failed) to get good pictures last night.

But as I waited for Nu's school bus (not with them, god forbid... I waited a respectful, nonchalant, and unembarrassing twenty paces away), all this loveliness just showed up.

Pic: Yesterday's super blue moon at sunrise this morning.

celebrations

It's EM's birthday! It's my dad's birthday! AD is in remission! It's a blue moon! It's a blue moon and a super moon! It's raksha bandhan! 

After work, I was in and out of the house all evening taking soup to AD and pastries and presents to EM (whom we celebrated over dinner last week). Many folks do all this commuting everyday with their kids' activities and sports and... wow. It's a lot.

Our rakhi days are different from everyone else's. This year, only Nu is wearing their rakhi on their wrist; At is wearing theirs on their ankle (work doesn't allow bracelets), and Huck and Max are wearing theirs on their collars. The kids--human and canine--have been tying on rakhis and promising to protect each other for as long as I can remember. But the years are distinct. This is Max's first; we missed Scout. I looked back at last year's celebration, and it feels like a different pandemic world!

After dinner, we called my dad to serenade him with birthday songs and then went outside to look for the blue super moon. My city kids (pointing at a distant streetlight) "Is that it?" (Face palm.)

We finally found it later and higher in the sky--so, so lovely!