Showing posts with label Body. Show all posts
Showing posts with label Body. Show all posts

Sunday, August 01, 2021

the week ahead




L snapped a picture of me down by the Red Cedar on the first of my three hikes (sequentially with L, BS, and EM) today.

I'm scheduled for a work seminar Mon and Tues and a professional webinar Weds and Thurs, so it seemed like a good idea to get all the hiking I wanted in today. 

Also a good idea... scheduling a massage for Friday. 



Friday, July 16, 2021

three in a row


Scout, Huck, and I hosted bookclub while Big A, At, and Nu did their own thing. I'd planned to have a garden party, but rain was in the forecast and mosquitoes were out in force, so I moved it indoors. And just like that we had our first indoors party since the pandemic started.

Here, Huck, Scout, and I (L to R) are spooning in blissed-out collapse after dinner.

[Pic by Nu, reflected in the glass door.]

Tuesday, July 13, 2021

Jig



Seaplane back to Seattle today.

I got to play copilot too.

Play copilot--I didn't actually touch any of the controls... 

I guess that had a lot to do with how I made it to Seattle, then to Detroit, and finally home today.


Wednesday, June 30, 2021

child


"Guess what I am,"
says the child
snuggling next to me
fists under their chin
trying to--"look cute."

And so I guess: A baby bunny rabbit?
A kitten? A puppy?
Nope. Nope. Nope.
I'm so wrong.

They are, "A Baby Praying Mantis."
I guess I've always 
known they'd keep  
making me smile.




Words: Nu; July 31, 2012. 
Pic: The trans-flag kandi Nu made today.

Sunday, June 27, 2021

feeling--recursive


I take the photos in this family
--every time I send one 
to you, sister

you demand to know where I am.
I'm behind the camera,
I travel back

with the sticky facts of tenderness.
What could ever replace  
you reminding me 

to burn like fire, like diamonds
the beloved coal of my body 
hybrid, haptic, whole


[Pic: An indoors kind of day; the kids have to delink settler colonialism and Catan for me every time.]



Friday, June 18, 2021

shadow friends



When cousin P and I had a marathon chat last week, she lamented how all the people who were so amazing to us when we came to the U.S. as grad students: the kind, generous, progressive folks--who fed us, acclimated us, radicalized us--seem to have disappeared. 

Not true, I said--thinking of L--I walk with one of them almost everyday. 

[Pic: L and I being silly with our shadows in the Red Cedar on Farm Lane yesterday.]

Thursday, June 10, 2021

gaze




I begin to unpin guilt like it's hair
hold my own hand as it trembles
a stare still lies a bit out of reach
grows into a new part of my body

my body goes old young indifferent
time folding across like a clock-face 
and hands clap for what comes next 
texting alien syllables from my name

analog clock, digital face, so partial
to opening my heart all the way like
I once said I would in a secret place
we know where it stays dark all night

Tuesday, June 08, 2021

newcomer

 


our day is burning,
silence like smoke

light seems machine
in interim and enters

anyway, opens the door
to our histories of hope

in arrival--we are blessed
death is certain someday 

we get to live out survival
tithing... every happiness 

Thursday, June 03, 2021

sorry...


I have to go. Someone loves me very, very, very much, and I need to go pay them attention.


(Oh. Also: In a post-pandemic first, Big A and I rode our goofy tandem bike downtown and got a pitcher of margaritas at a new--to us, anyway--restaurant.)


Saturday, May 29, 2021

At's graduation redux!


At is in graduation robes again, the sibs are wearing ties, we got grandparents and family on FaceTime/WhatsApp...

It was a bit chaotic and didn't go completely as planned, but this international photoshoot is the closest we're getting to a graduation party this year.

🙂

Saturday, May 22, 2021

passing/passage


The blue blob is me with Scout's face wedged into my hip and what seems to be his preternaturally elongated body is actually part Huck. 

At went to Alma to visit friends (he's post vaccination and also an adult ¯\_(ツ)_/¯); Big A went to work; Nu had been irritable and took themselves off to bed early.

So this was me for the rest of the evening as I started and finished a novel--Brit Bennett's The Vanishing Half--in one long gulp. I read the parts about passing breathlessly--racial passing + gender/trans passing. And it began to feel like being an immigrant is also somewhat like passing--in the sense that you leave an old self behind, propelled as much by necessity and accident as by some form of selfishness/self-centeredness. 



Wednesday, May 19, 2021

context




breath is a hymn 
accomplishing joy
surfacing tree brown
I come back to my body
through the sacred,
absurd landscape
of patience

[Pic: Scout and Huck hanging out with me in puppy pose.]

Monday, May 17, 2021

focus


Lots of stuff going on--including working in my office, office visits at various doctors etc., but a walk with JG and a porch hang with KB and... hours of jabber and banter are the points I want to remember from today. 

(Spot the bunny in the picture!) 

Tuesday, May 11, 2021

lift your lantern up

Vacuuming in At's room, I chuckled because he'd helpfully put his bungee-chairs and side-tables on top of his bed so I could clean easily without having to move stuff around. As I told him, my mom used to do the same with her cleaners so they'd clean more thoroughly. 

Anyway--his camping lantern had fallen to the floor, so I asked if he could "lift your [his] lantern up" and a look of total befuddlement came over his face. Turns out, he thought it was an axiom he hadn't heard before in the vein of that hymn "This Little Light of Mine"--I'm going to let it shine, etc. 😂😂

And then this little love of mine took care of some yard work unprompted. 🥰🥰

Monday, May 03, 2021

promise


this is where i will love you
this is how you're spoken for
i will surround you with care
i will celebrate you with song

you will be stronger for my love
all i say to you will be only kind
you will know you are important 
find comfort when you "just can't"

we'll still need the earth for this body
as we fill the sky with soul and dreams
if they fall into a net, i'll make you a nest 
even should you falter, i'll believe in your best




Mostly a promise to anyone who needs it, even if it's mostly me. 

The nice things I've done for myself recently (pedestrian objects alert) is (a) get toothbrushes with tiny heads--perhaps they don't renovate my mouth, hasten world peace, etc., but they also don't constantly bump up against my gums and teeth; (b) get sporks--so easy to use esp. when multitasking and all the better for cleaning my plate/bowl.


Saturday, May 01, 2021

"alone in a world so cold"



the world changes in the next line 
not in a full way/just kidding
but I summon/succumb

start assuming our story as reality--
no--a fantasy--something festal 
--or elastic as seasons

and still--don't know where I'm going
but I'm going and I'm arriving
where you will embrace me

-----------------------------------

On this windy, spring day: At graduated today with honors in Poli Sci and History. Jim Daniels as commencement speaker was a pleasant surprise.

Friday, April 23, 2021

reflection



Just scraps of cherry blossom petals; dead leaves; dank water; my bundled-up, masked, shadowy reflection...

Somehow, I love these colors and shapes together.



[MSU Horticultural Gardens]



Sunday, April 18, 2021

sweet/hurt


My sweet Nu made me a matching rainbow kandi bracelet and taught me how to trade it proper P.L.U.R.-style.

Definitely the highlight of my weekend.

I'm worried about Covid spikes in MI and even more worried about the tsunami of numbers coming out of India. Extremely worried for my parents who got their second vaccine shot last week, and are experiencing some persistent and alarming discomfort / symptoms.

Wednesday, April 14, 2021

just sayin'



Nu isn't allowed to say the "B" word. 

None of us really do--but I did buy some Bitchin' Sauce because the name made me chuckle (and it's tasty!). Now the sauce is all gone and Nu has a new earring.

And it's definitely making a statement.

And reminded me of a long ago moment.