synonyms swarm in my belly
rushing, quickly, soon
hug me, hug me
other hours restlessly lie waiting
an urgent clock is ticking
and marking history
hug me, hug me
in sleep, an endless future patiently
cradles every chance not absence
I'll have to wake soon, mom
hug me, hug me now
_______________
Note: One of those dreams where I was telling my mom to hug me quickly... the urgency made no sense. Except on some level, I was aware I was dreaming.
Pic: Red Cedar from the Hagadorn Bridge with Big A after a long walk downtown for his Boss Day dinner. (Reminder: In a college town, the weekend starts on Thursday evening.)
12 comments:
xoxo
This reminds me of my darling friend Marilee. When her mom died, she told me that the words constantly going through her mind, day and night, no matter what else she was doing, were ‘I want my mommy…I want my mommy’. So difficult. Such a singular, awful pain. I hope you have lots of dream visits with your mom, and lots of hugs there.
I get the urgency of the hug me. We don't want to awaken from dreams with our mom and all we want it a hug. Big hugs from me -- not the same, but hopefully they help channel the love.
The last two lines are very powerful.
I can feel the urgency and poignancy in this poem, maya. Part of that is the refrain, but there's also a development of emotions that increases in each stanza.
The lines "in sleep, an endless future patiently
cradles every chance" the word choice is absolutely perfect. Not only is it evocative (using Cradle in a poem about longing for your mother), but it has terrific consonance with the repetition of the S sound, making it soft, drowsy, and like a lullaby.
It's a very good poem.
<3
OMG, J--That is such a chorus in my head too. Something I'll verbalize out loud to A sometimes because it still feels so weird and impossible to believe. (And thank you!)
Jeanie, I'll take all the hugs you can spare <3; thank you!
Thank you, Steph
Thank you, Nance
Sending you lots of love, friend. Even though there was a sense of urgency to that dream, I hope it was somewhat comforting to see your mom in your dream!
This is not the same, but sometimes when I dream of my children as babies or toddlers I feel the same urgency to hug them and smell them and kiss them because I know it's going to be fleeting. But it's still nice.
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