*Thank you, America for welcoming me back with a school shooting. I've been thinking of Madison, WI friends all day. I know Sarah's kids are in public school (the shooting was at a private Christian school), but it's got to be scary having something like that happen in your city. (It's also the second or third time the media have tried to wrongly blame a trans kid for the shooting. WTH?)
*It's Dec 16th and I did not get an email from our Provost, so it's ok to assume I still have a job.
*I've landed very firmly back into Christmas prep territory. I did a ton before I left, so there's just stuff I'd be doing around this time anyway (cookies, last-minute wrapping, panic gift sourcing). I'm writing this relaxing by the glow of our Christmas tree.
*Our holiday cards are delayed, but that's because I wanted to include a pic of our sisters' Greece trip. I enjoyed wearing matching things every day with my sister and being a dork.
* Speaking of dorks, our partners have made miraculous recoveries.
* Also, Big A drove an hour+ to pick me up at the airport with a drink and snacks and I had flowers and chocolate waiting for me at home. True Love! I'd stopped eating chocolate a few years ago, but I never waste anything, so loved ones have figured out that I'll eat it if someone else buys it for me--this is a cheat, right?
*In the same vein, I've been sending all my discretionary cash to people's GoFundMes in the past year, so having to spend money on myself on the trip was a bit jarring. But it was for my sister's big birthday, and I don't get to decide how she spends her corporate salary. Nevertheless, I had to spend a lot of time talking myself through these rationalizations before I could fall asleep at night.
*I avoided the news this last week, but I learned today that Reem's grandfather died in an Israeli shelling. I'm not a "I'm glad they get to be together now in heaven" type of person; I'm a "they should both be alive together on earth kind of person." So I'm both sad and mad.
*Lisa asked if my sister and I had done a trip like this before--we haven't! My kids are finally at a point where I can take off for something like this without much prep. Ironically, although my sister doesn't have kids, our elderly parents live with her, and it requires a lot more planning on her end now.
*Nance and Lisa also picked up on my mention of a squabble. This was despite both of us being on our best behavior. We haven't lived together in thirty+ years and are very different. For instance, we have diametrically opposed views on this year's revolution in Bangladesh. But at the same time, we want similar things like the secular India of our childhood that was a shelter and leader to third-world causes. So we can make it work. We plan to go to Egypt for my 60th!
19 comments:
Ugh, the shooting. So terrible. I'd say unimaginably terrible, but it's surprisingly easy to imagine. I hate it. WHAT IS GOING ON to make our kids so angry, and how can we fix it? (Gun are the problem obviously, but what else?)
No news is good news as far as your job is concerned, it sounds like.
Egypt will be amazing, and since you are very coy about your age I have no idea when that will be! But I wanted to tell you that Rob and I went there in 2000 and it was incredible. I loved every minute of it. Cairo was such an incredible rush of a city, Luxor was amazing, so was Aswan. We also hiked up Mount Sinai to watch the sunrise and it was such a special experience, one I will always remember. Ooooohhhhh I'm so excited for you!
I also feel like I am in a new era of my life where I can travel without worrying about "who's looking after the kids, can I leave them" because, you know, they are adults. It's something I low-key feared but now am embracing and really, doesn't that sum up life?
Enjoy
Two strong and independent women have Discussions. Was it really and truly a squabble? It's hard when siblings get together because they revert sometimes to familiar roles, I know.
So glad your husband made a full recovery and thoughtfully greeted you with such romantic gifts. You were obviously missed!
As a mom of school-age children, any news of a school shooting hurts our hearts. I haven't read any details, and I'm wondering how the gun got into the school. Our school has metal detectors now- not that that's the solution, but it does make me feel a little safer.
Glad you were welcomed back so warmly! If you start to feel unappreciated at home, the best thing you can do is go away for a few days. You will definitely be missed!
The school shootings happen with such discouraging regularity.
Congrats on surviving the purge.
Sounds like a nice welcome home. I have a similar cheat with cheese. I pretend I don't know most of it has rennet and is not strictly vegetarian. If it says rennet on the label, I don't buy it, but otherwise I don't enquire too vigorously. I used to let the kids eat gummy candy when they were little, though some of it has gelatin. I need a little plausible deniability in these matters.
Ugh. the school shooting news was devastating. The timing was eerily similar to the Sandy Hook shootings (that happened on 12/14). I hate that this is something our children seemingly need to live with. I was a senior in HS when the Columbine shooting occurred so I grew up in an era where schools shootings were not a thing. Sigh. Now my kids will do active shooter drills.
I am glad you still have your job but YIKES. What a stressful situation. We've had a job cuts but we typically don't know when they will happen - they are sprung on us but it's probably better to be surprised versus worry over whether I will lose my job?
I would love to do a trip with my younger sister for my 50th birthday. That is about 6 years from now so her youngest will be around 5 at that point. We'll see if we can pull it off. I would want to go back to Paris because that is my favorite city and while I don't re-read books in general, I love to revisit places I love. I like novelty, too, but I would love to show my sister the beauty of Paris! Egypt for your 60th sounds amazing!! And I am glad you and your sister have such a healthy relationship. I would say I have a healthy relationship with 1.5 siblings. Maybe 2. It really shifts depending on a variety of factors. It's kind of mind boggling that all 5 of us came from the same gene pool. I could not be more different than 2 of my 4 siblings...
I just can't imagine sending children to school in this country. Of course most students are safe most days, but those extraordinary circumstances are so so tragic. Other countries don't have these problems and it's such a black eye for the United States. I guess at this point, no one wants to truly tackle it.
No need to comment on this—I find it very interesting that you and your sister have diametrically opposing views on Bangladesh yet similar desires for India. In an ideal world, I’d love to sip some tea and hear both of your thoughts. (PoliSci/IR nerd for life!)
Also, I admire that you care deeply and give with lavish generosity. And, I am also delighted that you were a recipient of generosity (including chocolate!). Your happiness and joy can also be a form of resistance. ❤️
Sending a Tuesday sub sandwich, as I know sometimes reentry requires extra nourishment. :)
-Steph
Right? Guns and the existence of this option as a possibility perhaps? Kids tend to fantasize around what seems possible...
Thanks, Nicole! I think there are no guarantees, but I'm going to avoid stressing for the upcoming year...
I *am* looking forward to the freedom of the empty nest. I thought you knew my birth year! Didn't we have a long FB conversation about how I was older than you once? (I avoid mentioning the year on the internet for the same reason I don't advertise our street address... Although if you have my full name I think both are already available via Google.)
Anyway, I've made notes and hope to bug you more about Egypt when the time comes (she says mysteriously :) ).
:)
Nance, I love your generous reading--but honestly, even in a discussion, I'm holding back a little. Perhaps it's not the healthiest, but we see each other so rarely, it seems a worthwhile safeguard.
As the older sister, I was revered for the first two decades, but I try not to let that go to my head :)
Jenny--I always thing of the Sandy Hook kids at Christmas time and the Parkland kids around Valentine's Day...
And every time *I* walk into a classroom, I'm checking for safe spaces and steps to take.
It really doesn't have to be this way!
StephLove, "Purge" is the perfect way to describe it. I've also used "culling" in my head. (sob)
Thank you for sharing the cheat as plausible deniability--therein hangs our tale.
Paris sounds AMAZING, Lisa!! I hope you get to pull that off!
With five sibs, you have choices... My sis and I have no one else!
I think you're right and it's too entrenched, Engie. There's so much anxiety around this, I think everyone would be happier if we tackled it though.
I already had dinner, so saving my special sub for tomorrow, Steph! (That hypothetical tea sounds lovely. I'd be up for it!)
Also, THANK YOU for the sub!! (Where are my manners?!)
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