Thursday, July 28, 2022

the telling


everyone loves stories, we know
no one can be lonely with them
for their arms stretch both ways
to hold you in: openings endings 

their hands can pinch together
the holy ghostly glory of time
so by the time you step back  
blue skies are pink-purple-red

& evening is squeezy as a bosom 
roomy for whatever comes next
if sun: to show our fiery hearts
if rain: to share forgotten tears



Pic: Bee on thistle; English Garden @MSU.

Wednesday, July 27, 2022

on the outside


Tried something new today--took Nu along on a small hike with L.

I missed being outside, but I didn't feel comfortable leaving Nu by himself because of all the health stuff. This way, both of us get to be around each other, get some fresh air, and build our stamina. 

It was a good start. The only downside being Nu wore his Doc Martens and got a blister and then wished he'd listened to me--I hate being right sometimes.

Pic: This was our best "ussie" via our reflections--waving creepily at our reflections in the Red Cedar River was L's idea.

Tuesday, July 26, 2022

"a rocket of heavenly delight"

Last night just as I was falling asleep, the phrase "a rocket of heavenly delight" popped into my head and in those few seconds, I was SO CERTAIN that I'd discovered SUCH A brilliant creative phrase. THE MOST.

When I woke up for the day, I wasn't sure what I'd meant by it or what I would use it for. I know it was some tongue-in-cheek riff off of The Garden of Earthly Delights, but I wasn't sure of the how, why, or what. 

Nu thinks that I maybe meant it as a paean to the Spain trip where we got to see the triptych at the Prado? 

Or maybe this is just what happens when 2 am becomes the time you fall asleep.

Anyway, like Kanye, Nu didn't graduate from outpatient care, he just decided he was finished. So we're home with exercises and things to monitor and follow up on. We started a new show Heartstopper, which I find adorable. Nu critically noted that the show--about two gay teenagers--is written by a woman, but he appears to be charmed nevertheless. 

Having a somewhat normal day and knowing that we don't have to report to outpatient in the morning is like being on a rocket of heavenly delight nice. (Ok, I'll stop trying to make "a rocket of heavenly delight" happen... I can see it's not going to happen.😏)


Monday, July 25, 2022

Thinking about "The Mother"

A long time ago, I read Lydia Davis's "The Mother" from Break it Down. Here it is in its entirety: 

The girl wrote a story. “But how much better it would be if you wrote a novel,” said her mother. The girl built a doll-house. “But how much better if it were a real house,” her mother said. The girl made a small pillow for her father. “But wouldn’t a quilt be more practical,” said her mother. The girl dug a small hole in the garden. “But how much better if you dug a large hole,” said her mother. The girl dug a large hole and went to sleep in it. “But how much better if you slept forever,” said her mother.

Although I read it so long ago, it's always in the back of my head as a reminder of how not to "fix things." While that chilling paragraph is about the specific dynamics of mother-daughter relationships, I think it works for parenting/teaching/editing/being a friend or partner too. There are more of Davis's stories here.

Sunday, July 24, 2022

ouch

This poem by Pat Schneider is a lovely reminder to be grateful for details in our lives. But I'm guessing it's not good when only inanimate objects come through for you?

Good: Catching up with EM, BS, and JG after a couple of weeks having too much going on. I appreciate their love, support, expertise, and empathy so much.

Bad: Toss up between the UU trip that didn't happen to the 911 call that almost did.

Ugly: Websites that tell me facts I'm not ready to hear.

Saturday, July 23, 2022

summer reminder

Beal Gardens yesterday and Farmers' Market today--I can still enjoy other people's adventures in gardening this summer. 

I am filled with gratefulness for sunshine, rain, sweet breezes, summer produce...

This is the summer of the sweetest cherries I've ever eaten...

This is the most bug-free summer I remember...

Just one more month of this radiant, glorious time; enjoy, enjoy, enjoy!

Pic: Beal Gardens, MSU

Friday, July 22, 2022

an indoor herd

At visited, Big A is the pink blur on the Portal screen, the puppies and I are off camera...but we're ALL kind of in the rumpus room together

At and Nu are looking at a Junji Ito together while also watching RRR on the big screen, and we can see and hear Big A making himself dinner in Milwaukee and everyone is sharing news and lobbing jokes off each other. 

Busy and messy, yes. But life-affirming and comfortable and the best/only way I could get my herd together today. 

I enjoyed every minute of it.

India at 75

After a few writers shared it on FB,  I've been reading this WONDERFUL collection of 75 writers on India's 75th birthday from PEN al...