"in the middle"

NGS celebrated the beginning of summer like a proper grown up at the summer solstice. I realized I've been celebrating summer since Memorial Day--when the public pools open--as the unofficial start of summer. The Solstice gave me a bit of a pang actually: the days are getting a bit shorter, it marks midsummer, and is a reminder that we're halfway through summer vacation.

In any case, we're certainly right in the middle of things--summer projects, deadlines, delays... all of it! 

Started the day with a work meeting on Teams and ditched the last fifteen minutes to take Max to his first vet appointment. This champion baby has doubled in weight and didn't whimper or even wince when he got his shots or his microchip. He also barfed like a champion in the car both ways though, and I was glad to have Big A so I could just cuddle Max while A did the gross clean up. Also: I was crying all day since it's the first time I've been back at the vet since Scout. There was a candle in the reception area (to request silence--when it's lit it means someone is saying goodbye to a pet) and Big A sweetly tried to block what I could see with his body, and get me to just go to the car, but I still caught a glimpse as I exited.

I locked my sad and grumpy self up for some deep work and then my last meeting of the day was a fitting. Who knew when I stopped modeling 20+ years ago that I'd have a chance at picking it up in someplace not New York again? Ha. It's for a friend who's designing for a local charity event called 'Refashion' where old materials are repurposed, and I'm honored to be helping. Nicole had warned about menopausal gains, and I realized when JN did my measurements that my "middle" measurements were different. Ha ha ha and c'est sera, sera.

Pic: A cardinal in the garden. I saw a hummingbird the other day too. Aren't both supposed to be visitors from the the other world? 

Note: Jimmy Eats World's "In the Middle" is not a song I particularly enjoy and yet it follows me around on every radio station I enjoy. 

clan

genes cling like ghosts

as they sketch the tides

of tomorrow and today

time flies, hours flower,

smiles wake then to sing

in the tune of our bodies

of how we are built bone

by bone, and so sensitive 

of seasons not yet come 

in the rustle of the years

see flashes of possibility

all the strange certainties 

of dust and of distance

in the middle of things

coiling through our kin

Pic: Nu, Big A, and Grandma S.

 

six exclamations on Saturday

MIL tells Max to get "four on the floor." I think he gets "sit" most of the time, but he hasn't worked his way up to rhyming slang yet. HA

L is off to Cuba with suitcases full of school supplies as everything is in short supply over there... I snuck in some silk scarves for our friends Y and C because I wanted them to have presents too. Later, as I pulled stuff off the pantry and freezer shelves to make dinner, I thought a lot about how I take having 'stuff' for granted. UGH

Big A, a U-Haul truck, and the last day of the apartment in Milwaukee. YAY YAY YAY

As I chatted to family at various points today (mom, aunts, uncle, sister, MIL), and answered questions people were asking, I realized things just aren't going smoothly for us. I tend to focus on good things (coping mechanism?), but... YIKES

I planted more geraniums and marigolds in the garden today. Not because they're my summer favorites, but because deer leave those alone most of the time. I try to give the deer a pass because everyone has to eat, but it's summer and there's a yard full of green foliage they could have with no rancor from me. Leave the flowers alone, deer. DANG

Pic: Nu and their Grandma S went to ukulele camp together and got their picture taken with the giant ukulele. AW

going away

somewhere between here and everywhere 

and expanded by prayer

a day dissolves, alive with things we need

to rescue us again and again 

like: the overlapping wisp of a forgotten song;

seas hinged by storms;

butterflies who crawl shyly before their flight; 

it's never for nothing

Pic: On the Red Cedar, I found this strange fellow--a bearded blue heron, right?

 

"back to life, back to reality"

At and Nu were lovely while Big A and I were gone: they took care of themselves and the puppy sibs, attended Pride events together, hosted DSA-related meetings here, and kept the house neat through it all. So while I did a complete vacuuming, cleaning, and restocking of the house today, I didn't have to navigate any big messes--just the little ones that no one but me notices.

But I kept vacation vibes going with two long hikes with Big A. Then we vented and backup planned about the delay in his Michigan job, I worked on the garden (deer ate our hostas and annual flowers again), and Big A worked on replacing the mailbox that someone ran into last week. 

Also: I joined a new committee at work (the invitation came from someone I want to work with), am thinking about volunteering for taking on an extra overload course at work next year (we've had a sad and surprise departure in the department), and reassured an editor that I'll have work to them by the end of next week according to our schedule (I hope it's not wishful thinking).

We got home yesterday, but today felt like we were really back!

Pic: Big A with Huckie and Max. Not a very good picture, but it makes me smile--all of it: Huckie's side eye, Max's proprietary paw, the fact that Big A is still wearing the two-dollar bead bracelet I got him...
 

moving on with joy

Once in a way there's a travel picture of me that tells me about myself. Last year, the picture of me at Sagrada Familia reminded me of the experience of awe in the face of beauty.

The picture here reminds me that I am capable of silliness and joy. A touchstone to keep me going in the colder/harsher/busier months of the year... 

We were only gone for five days, but it was such a reset in so many ways, it feels so much longer.

Pic: Under a waterfall in the hotel swimming pool.

Jamaica 

so blue

A walk by myself this morning to say goodbye to this incredible blend of sea-sky-horizon blues.

Pic: From the boardwalk.

Jamaica (Day #5 LaterPost)