six exclamations on Saturday

MIL tells Max to get "four on the floor." I think he gets "sit" most of the time, but he hasn't worked his way up to rhyming slang yet. HA

L is off to Cuba with suitcases full of school supplies as everything is in short supply over there... I snuck in some silk scarves for our friends Y and C because I wanted them to have presents too. Later, as I pulled stuff off the pantry and freezer shelves to make dinner, I thought a lot about how I take having 'stuff' for granted. UGH

Big A, a U-Haul truck, and the last day of the apartment in Milwaukee. YAY YAY YAY

As I chatted to family at various points today (mom, aunts, uncle, sister, MIL), and answered questions people were asking, I realized things just aren't going smoothly for us. I tend to focus on good things (coping mechanism?), but... YIKES

I planted more geraniums and marigolds in the garden today. Not because they're my summer favorites, but because deer leave those alone most of the time. I try to give the deer a pass because everyone has to eat, but it's summer and there's a yard full of green foliage they could have with no rancor from me. Leave the flowers alone, deer. DANG

Pic: Nu and their Grandma S went to ukulele camp together and got their picture taken with the giant ukulele. AW

going away

somewhere between here and everywhere 

and expanded by prayer

a day dissolves, alive with things we need

to rescue us again and again 

like: the overlapping wisp of a forgotten song;

seas hinged by storms;

butterflies who crawl shyly before their flight; 

it's never for nothing

Pic: On the Red Cedar, I found this strange fellow--a bearded blue heron, right?

 

"back to life, back to reality"

At and Nu were lovely while Big A and I were gone: they took care of themselves and the puppy sibs, attended Pride events together, hosted DSA-related meetings here, and kept the house neat through it all. So while I did a complete vacuuming, cleaning, and restocking of the house today, I didn't have to navigate any big messes--just the little ones that no one but me notices.

But I kept vacation vibes going with two long hikes with Big A. Then we vented and backup planned about the delay in his Michigan job, I worked on the garden (deer ate our hostas and annual flowers again), and Big A worked on replacing the mailbox that someone ran into last week. 

Also: I joined a new committee at work (the invitation came from someone I want to work with), am thinking about volunteering for taking on an extra overload course at work next year (we've had a sad and surprise departure in the department), and reassured an editor that I'll have work to them by the end of next week according to our schedule (I hope it's not wishful thinking).

We got home yesterday, but today felt like we were really back!

Pic: Big A with Huckie and Max. Not a very good picture, but it makes me smile--all of it: Huckie's side eye, Max's proprietary paw, the fact that Big A is still wearing the two-dollar bead bracelet I got him...
 

moving on with joy

Once in a way there's a travel picture of me that tells me about myself. Last year, the picture of me at Sagrada Familia reminded me of the experience of awe in the face of beauty.

The picture here reminds me that I am capable of silliness and joy. A touchstone to keep me going in the colder/harsher/busier months of the year... 

We were only gone for five days, but it was such a reset in so many ways, it feels so much longer.

Pic: Under a waterfall in the hotel swimming pool.

Jamaica 

so blue

A walk by myself this morning to say goodbye to this incredible blend of sea-sky-horizon blues.

Pic: From the boardwalk.

Jamaica (Day #5 LaterPost)

hanging out

Every day is for falling asleep in the sunshine cradled in hammocks and rocked by sea breezes...

Pic: Adjoining hammocks for me and Big A.

Jamaica (Day #4 LaterPost)

 

daydrinking / celebrating

We rarely drink anymore, so the sun and a second cocktail are all it takes to feel like a circus.

Happy Anniversary to us!

Pic: Sitting around in wet swimmies with drinks on the patio.

Jamaica (Day #3 LaterPost)

basic beach

I can't believe I'm actually on the beach! I love the vacation sunglasses I got online; I plan to wear them everywhere...

Pic: On the beach right after breakfast.

Jamaica (Day #2 LaterPost)

 

and off we go!

We had to leave at 4:15 am to make our flight...

We're masking less and less these days, but airplanes and elevators still make me anxious. Even if it's not Covid, I don't want your cooties, thank you very much. 

Pic: On the plane to Montego Bay 

Jamaica (Day #1 LaterPost)

so long

A day of goodbyes: an early morning stroll with L who is "on call" while At is in charge of the younger sibs, visits with my CASA kids, drinks with girlfriends this evening, extended hugs and detailed notes for the kids, wondering what Max will make of my absence...

Still unresolved: some packing dilemmas and general anxiety. I just gave myself a stern talking-to about how incongruous it is to be panicking about vacation. 

Pic: Waterlilies waking up; at MSU Radiology Gardens with L.

(as if) I am

I am not afraid of what I wished for 

I am a rock, I can grow old--

though tides pass over me like words 

for feelings I don't know

I sit still as breath in a shell, wonder

which side of sleep I am on

I open my arms to show you how big
but the ocean is already gone

Note: I guess I'm already daydreaming about sitting oceanside, although that's not till the end of the week. I'm so excited...

Pic: Max and Huck post groomer's. Max has such heart-emoji eyes for their big sib. Huck has somehow already lost their bandana.