Monday, September 26, 2011

Two Scenes from a Marriage

The water pipes must have been flushed today because all the non filtered taps have been gushing muddy brown. Normally, I'd just deal, but since we lost our weekly housecleaner over a month ago, I've been doing a deep clean of the toilets on Sunday night. This is Monday morning. All that work wasted. I tell Big A.
Big A: I know, Puppy. I felt so bad. That's why I've been trying to direct my pee on all the muddy water marks.
Me: Yeah. You're a helper keeper.

***************
No real reason why, but when I got out of the shower this morning I simply had to ask Big A.

Me: You know how... when you orgasm... and it feels like everything is radiating from the pelvic area [I'm all scientific terminology and shit, apparently]... because a dwarf's penis... would be proportionately larger than his relative body size....  does it mean that his orgasm would be that much more intense?
[I think it says something about our level of discourse that Big A doesn't look surprised by this.]
Big A: You would have to ask a dwarf that, Puppy.
Me: You mean they didn't cover this in medical school?
Big A: No.
Me: What a woefully inadequate education.

_

2 comments:

Attorney At Large said...

I think I'm impressed you know a dwarf's penis would be relatively large compared to his body size. :)

Also: I could see us having this conversation!

maya said...

I imagine, AAL-- I imagine a lot of things :).

And I can see you having this conversation! (I cannot many other people (mom) having this conversation, and that makes me sad somewhere.