Wednesday, May 27, 2020

Two Months +

I was hit with such an intense wave of nostalgia for things the way they used to be when I stopped by college to water my plants and pick up some books.
Plants are doing fine;
i need to tidy some shelves.
I didn't see A SINGLE SOUL--it made me yearn for colleagues or students and prompted me to wonder how long this somewhat outdated model of faculty offices will carry on.

Will all the years of shared office space through grad school and adjuncting, waiting to have an office of my own, and then finally earning an office with a tiny window have been for nothing?

At read me his thesis on John Brown as we drove north, and we were both surprised how quickly we got to the Maple River.

Tuesday, May 26, 2020

Muddy Darling

Nu: Very muddy and so very darling.

At has been busy with writing his thesis, so this week Nu has been a superstar planting ground-cover and honeysuckle and viburnum and lilacs and lilies...

(Deer have already eaten the lilacs and lilies., but we're hoping they--plants not deer--can recover and make a comeback.)

Monday, May 25, 2020


The kids rigged up some netting around the veggie plots today. The good news is that our raggedy three-legged-deer is doing well. And well, there is no bad news, but the tomato plants were chomped down to the stalks, and I'd like some tomatoes this year.

This sequel actually started last night, when Scout woke me up around two am, and I found our friend was back when I turned on the lights. The great news is although their gait is wobbly as they move from one tomato plant to another, their gallop is speedy--something I discovered as a fresh outburst from Scout startled them and they shot off into the dark.

Saturday, May 23, 2020

Ha... Ha... Happiness

Still a bit weary--but this picture's sole purpose is to make me chuckle. At is in his "Prestige Worldwide" tee and a Wonder Woman apron, with hesitance about plunging his hands into the dough displayed in every inch of his being. (The long-ago speech therapist was right--sensory play is the answer.) And of course, being in the kitchen with At is its own happiness too.

I guess I would not have felt so hurt yesterday if I were working on a good project... and I have identified a couple of writing projects I could tackle. I haven't actually started them or anything though. Haha.

Friday, May 22, 2020

I am Loved, I am Enough

 I just needed a reminder of love today. Last week, I didn't get a teaching award I was nominated for (it went to someone amazing, but I still feel sad.) and today in student evals in addition to the usual notes about grading and reading load, a student suggested that I had made them feel stupid and that I wasn't "fond" of them. The one thing I always want to do is create a safe space and teach with tenderness, so that comment cut me so bad.

On top of it all, my planner has consistently been showing me that while I have been doing alright taking care of the fam, myself, and home, I consistently have little to record in the professional section--I'm not writing, editing, publishing. I need to stop cycling through distracting myself through every media available to me.