From For the Time Being: A Christmas Oratorio W.H. Auden

Well, so that is that. Now we must dismantle the tree,
Putting the decorations back into their cardboard boxes –
Some have got broken – and carrying them up to the attic.
The holly and the mistletoe must be taken down and burnt,
And the children got ready for school. There are enough
Left-overs to do, warmed-up, for the rest of the week –
Not that we have much appetite, having drunk such a lot,
Stayed up so late, attempted – quite unsuccessfully –
To love all of our relatives, and in general
Grossly overestimated our powers. Once again
As in previous years we have seen the actual Vision and failed
To do more than entertain it as an agreeable
Possibility, once again we have sent Him away

-

Christmas in the afternoon

We didn't get to opening presents until the afternoon

because Big A had worked the night before and needed a nap.

I held the kids at bay with the holiday casserole and mulled cider

and re-watching the second season of Stranger Things.

It turned out beautifully in the end 

(despite sleep deprived crankiness, roof worries, and health anxieties)

At gave me a Criterion copy of Chaplin's The Kid 

the first silent film we'd watched together--crazy to think it's almost a hundred years old

Nu gave me another book Molly's Story to go along with Wonder

Molly is a pupster and  has the sweetest beginning

Big A made my dreams come true

with the Alessi kettle I'd coveted for so long.

-

Just one day left

I'm still terrified to go into the basement

so I took a long walk in the snow instead.

On my way back, I constructed a soup 

to make for dinner--it was gumbo-y.

Then like the opposite of a real Santa, I snuck 

a few presents OUT of the kids' present pile--

I had gone overboard as usual.

_

MRI

my head brings its own book
my heart sings its own song

This close sky sees everything
is impersonal, is still, strong

I have lived    I am losing
I am living     I am learning

even love cannot shield us from
messages so familiar, of failure

Like a wish polished into prayer
Like a loss, before we call it lost

--------------------
Personal note:
Big A had to have an MRI today for numbness today. We're not sure what that means or what lies ahead for us.

Sssssssscary Shite

Pic from Big A recd. on my way home

If you look closely (if you dare to look)
you'll see a reaaaaally long snakeskin
sloughed off over the kids' scooters
IN THE BASEMENT

Is it still there? Did IT have BABIES?
I was right there just TWO DAYS AGO.
I'm already really terrified of snakes,
and now everything seems extra snake-y.

The kids were amused, but I got my revenge.
I gave them this line that's stuck in my head:
"the snake poured itself down the hole"
Then I cackled as it gave them the shivers.

_

Post

the flicker of your gaze
the burden of your hope
I am an ant under a crumb

this skin's dance is like
first-born-feather-light
of morning snow (I know

we might have gone our true
ways without a clue, except for
some secret script of the universe)

_

Saving Seven Words

Dan Smith‏ @danaturg 22h22 hours ago

I have eaten the fetus that was in the entitlement and which you were vulnerably saving for diversity Forgive me it was transgender so science-based And so evidence-based.

-
Note: This happened.