When people don't call me out on my whining...

It makes me think I actually have something to be worried about :/ 

3 hrs · 

This foggy, rainy day isn't helping my blues: (i) I'm home with a sick Nu (ii) At is about to board a plane wearing his beautiful brown skin and his proud beard and looking like Trump's nightmare (iii) the Parkland kids are making me cry/rage (iv) At is headed for St. Louis, so Michael Brown is on my mind a bit more than usual.

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36)9   Sophfronia Scott, Eyal Suseela and 78 others

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When your new haircut looks so cute

the hairdresser needs pictures

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Heroes come to life

Emma Gonzalez is my hero.





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Collective Noun for Humans in the Wild

Parkland

After Sandyhook (Dec 14, 2012) , I kept the kids home for the next week, because I couldn't bear to drop them off at school. Then Christmas break happened, and it was the new year, and they had to go back, and I remember I kept lingering in the kindergarten hallway having random kids excitedly come up to tell me about their Christmas presents--I didn't know all of them, I just happened to be taller than them... and there. Kids are... my heart.

Anyway--the Parkland, FL shooting was yesterday and today I dropped Nu off at school as always with a quick hug and kiss and I love you... and that was that.

Even I have gotten inured to this nonsense.

And today I look at this reel of the victims, and it hits all over again.


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First Cake

 It's chocolate and raspberry--or as she put it,

"Two iconic valentine's day flavors."

First taste of cake. I want to eat those arms and fingers too. 

(Pic courtesy Cousin N on FB)

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Mixed Intentions

Big A: "I thought it was cute that Huckie made her own bed out of pillows. Then I realized she was probably just hoarding them to spite Scoutie."

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Winter's Fangs

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Michigan Mardi Gras

The bird float is made of Meijer's plastic bags:

State pride and earth love :) 

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Junk Food and Socio-economic Class

I may be crying a little after reading how junk food has different values and meanings dependent on families' socio-economic status.

"For parents raising their kids in poverty, having to say "no" was a part of daily life. Their financial circumstances forced them to deny their children's requests — for a new pair of Nikes, say, or a trip to Disneyland — all the time. This wasn't tough for the kids alone; it also left the poor parents feeling guilty and inadequate. 

Next to all the things poor parents truly couldn't afford, junk food was something they could often say "yes" to. Poor parents told me they could almost always scrounge up a dollar to buy their kids a can of soda or a bag of chips. So when poor parents could afford to oblige such requests, they did."

In the Valley

The valley is empty
but threaded with ice

our lives have opened
like wave upon wave

I pretend I am a mother
duck, swanning placid

kids, cubs, pups, chicks
follow me automatically

through the feathered clefts
of childish hunger and snow

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Intimacy and Teens

I already ruined advertisements for my students with Jean Kilbourne's Killing Us Softly, and now I want everyone to read this story of porn educators and how they're attempting to unpack and expose the sad, porn-inspired performativity of  teenage sex. It's awful enough that we have no good sex ed, but worse that there's seemingly universal and facile access to bad porn:

"It’s not surprising, then, that some adolescents use porn as a how-to guide. In a study that Rothman carried out in 2016 of 72 high schoolers ages 16 and 17, teenagers reported that porn was their primary source for information about sex — more than friends, siblings, schools or parents."

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Nerd and Proud

The literature nerd in me sees the literature nerd in you.

Type in an author's name, and you can keep on finding others to follow. 

This must be what a rabbit hole feels like.

http://www.literature-map.com/ 

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#HamiltonNerds

Content

Your mouth bleeds curses,
nurses wandering silences

Technology's flashing ghost
in the turn and tap of keys

skimming the round
in-line like dancers

circling like sharks
inland, inaccessible

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A Study of Men Throwing

the man throws coffee

it snakes tendrils over her

the man throws acid

it pools pits across her skin

the man throws kerosene

under his gaze, she is afire

the man throws her off (the bus)

the man throws her out (the house)

the man throws away (her phone)

the man throws down (her kids) 

the man throws a ball

the man throws a party

the man throws bombs

the man throws his ire 

the man throws
throws it all away
the man throws
the man throws
the man throws
until overthrown

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The Shape of Water

I kinda liked The Shape of Water, but At made me chortle because he had a point when he termed it "Ponyo for adults."

And a bit Alf, I might add.
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Growing a Family

I’m very happy for some old neighbors/ex-colleagues/FB friends who adopted three children from the foster-care system today. We’ve known about the ongoing process, but they weren’t able to share pictures of the kids until the adoption was final (today!).

And I’m sad today, because it feels like I’ve waited all my life to adopt, and Big A is finally on board, but none of the agencies will follow up with us. I finally caved and did what I swore I wouldn’t do—called in for help from my CASA director. She’s called around and left messages; let’s see how far we go.

At least I get to take my oldest home for the weekend : )!

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Always, the Kindness of Strangers

Four classes back to back to back to back and all I wanted was to get home. First though, I needed to gas up the car. I did.

And then the car wouldn't start. The key fob just stopped working.

The temperature was in the teens (with bitter, biting winds), so I fiddled with the key fob, then scooted into the gas station looking for fob batteries (they didn’t have them) and then tried to get warm. I was piteously warming my frozen fingers on the side of the coffee maker when this woman with a gigantic, Kardashian sized ring asked me what was up. I thought she wanted me to move along. And I will forever be ashamed that I thrust my chin out mutinously, thinking mean thoughts about her, and told her I was trying to fix my key fob.

After that, she just took over. She found her reading glasses, pried the fob apart, and found some button cell batteries from old Christmas decorations, replaced the battery, checked it from the gas station window, gave me hug, and sent me on my way.

I got her name so I can take her a card and some pastries tomorrow, but it doesn’t feel like I can ever thank her enough.

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