Saturday, December 09, 2023

skin, hair, fur

Every night before he leaves for work, Big A has taken to reminding me to let go my feelings of overhwhelm and weltschmerz and focus on the things I can control. In the last two months, I've been staying up later and later... doomscrolling and breaking out in hives and acne and literally pulling my hair out (trichotillomania).  

Skin: So this week, I finally got to see a dermatologist who put me on tretinoin cream. Let the record show that I asked Big A to write me a prescription for tretinoin a month ago and he recoiled and refused as though I had asked for opioids or something and made me wait.

Hair: For my very gross and unattractive habit of self-induced hair loss, I ordered an OTC nutritive supplement.

Fur: Months ago, JN decided to be a Krampus for Krampus Nacht and asked if I would be their handler. It was still a bit of a surprise to see "Maya: Krampus Handler" on the organizing committee's list of duties. I didn't want to leave home this evening, but also didn't want to stand JN up, so I did go. It was small "f" fun.

Pic: A crowd of Krampuses in Old Town. I was so out of it, I wasn't in the least bit scared. 


Nance said...

Ah! A little hit of Schopenhauer for me this morning (beyond NEO's cloudy skies and sudden temperature drop).

Dear maya, I'm so sorry you're feeling depleted. Read some Walt Whitman "Song of Myself" and commune with Nature. Thank goodness you have dogs of your own. I often go visit my granddog Zydrunas down the street when I feel the need for Joy.


Gillian said...

Fun photo.

StephLove said...

I hope you can get the skin and hair issues resolved. I had unexplained hives for over six months a couple years back. The allergist never did figure it out, they just went away on their own, which he'd told me actually happens a lot. I hope yours disappear pronto.

North was pulling out their hair a few years ago and managed to stop after shaving it all off and growing it back, but now that it's long again, I think they may be doing it again. Is it a compulsion?

Nicole said...

Oh, did you order Nutrafol? I hope it helps. I didn't realize you were pulling it, oh, Maya, sweetie, you are such a compassionate and empathetic person, and as they say, the body keeps the score. I hope the tretinoin helps for the skin, too. (What is UP, Big A, with the keeping the prescription pad so close to the chest?)

Nicole said...

Also? Krampus keeper? I need more information.

maya said...

Nance--I hope your ennui went away. I know gray skies are a bane here as well. I didn't get to the Whitman today, but I did get some time outside and with my canine kids and it did help. Thank you! XOXO

Gillian--Thanks :).

StephLove--Thank you! I'm glad your hives went away. Mine don't last very long. They sort of manifest when I panic... I just wish I could remember to treat them with cortizone cream and not worry at them.

Steph, I'm so, so sorry to hear your beautiful baby's Trich is resurfacing. For me, it is compulsive behavior--I hope it's not for North.💗

Nicole--I need a bit of your sanity and equanimity! Yes, I did order the Nutrafol... your rec was the deciding factor! Lol on the prescription pad comment--right? Check your email tomorrow for more Krampus info :)!

Sarah said...

This Krampus situation is delightfully creepy-- love it!

I am a hair puller/twister-- solidarity. Good thing you have GOBS of it to begin with. Minnie pulled a bunch of her hair out when she was a new toddler (like, BALD SPOTS) (and she has started slowly doing it again while she's been sick-- stress response!!) And the biggest thing that helped her was alternate fidget options (textured toddler jewelry and dolls with yarn hair specifically). Gretchen Rubin always says to treat yourself like a toddler, so maybe find some fidgets for yourself? Jack loves thinking putty. I love to braid fringe on blankets.

on a break (Winter Break)

It was so rude of Big A to cheerily text me "one more year" on New Year's day and then explain that in 2025 Nu would be off to...