Saturday, September 24, 2022

yesterday's sunshine


yesterday's sunshine listens to me
guessing at laughter or at grief
yes, the kids are playing again
but no, they've not forgotten

yesterday's sunshine reminds me
I should live wildly--as if I can
erase distance, ease today's rain
warns me beacon-like: enjoy

Friday, September 23, 2022

"I saw the sign(s)"

A midday stroll with JG today and this was her front yard when I drove up--a veritable forest of election lawn signs! It includes at least two of our colleagues from work too. As always a lovely chat and I left feeling loved and full of ideas.

Back home lots of hangout time with Big A whose "Boss Day" it is and whom we'll have to  return to the train station and thence to Milwaukee Saturday morning. 

All these trips to the train station really remind me of residency days when Big A worked at Bellevue and I'd put two kids in the car to pick him up at the Summit train station. Seven-year-old At used to call those trips "midnight adventures." 

Now here we are again 16 years later, thanks to the magic of there somehow being 25 Emergency Medicine residencies in MI and only 2 in WI. We've come up with a plan (wish?) to renegotiate his contract for the next academic year... And although all of it is a long ways off, it's a hopeful sign on the horizon. 
 

Thursday, September 22, 2022

drop

The temperature dropped suddenly (and punctually for the autumn equinox) today. So here's me in blankets and puppies, by the heater in the study, trying to get teaching prep for tomorrow done before I get to PICK BIG A UP FROM THE TRAIN STATION!!

I don't know if it's silly to pine for one's partner at this stage in my life, but it also feels basic--you know? One should get to end every day with the person you picked for life.

Wednesday, September 21, 2022

*three thoughts *on the third day *of the work week

*Lots going on in the world outside and students were on fire today, discussing--the Hijab protests in Iran, the Venezuelans trafficked to Martha's Vineyard, the floods in Pakistan and Puerto Rico... 

*I felt buoyed today by an internet friend becoming a more IRL friend, work friends finding non work ways to connect, and my sister's glee that her birthday is "just four months away."

*When I need to laugh, I come back to this picture of "Kangaroo Huck" with her feet rudely positioned on Scout's butt, her "dress" askew, looking at me for pets. 

Tuesday, September 20, 2022

look up

I had to run an errand on the far side of town and found myself getting dejected by it as I always do... the houses seem to be falling down a bit more than normal, the cars seem rustier and noisier...

And I say this as someone who lives in a house whose roof has leaked for at least three years and has not been fixed although roof-work started [... and stopped] at the beginning of summer and as someone who drove a car with a busted-up headlight for nearly six months this year after my 'deer incident' as there were no replacement parts available.

But I know it's not really the same thing. My dejection is because how that is yet another nudge about how we live in a world of inequity, recognizing how huge this is, and coming to terms that it's not something I can ever begin to fix by myself. 

And then on my way home I came to this crossroads (It reads: ML King Jr. Blvd and Malcolm X St). That made me smile so big because sometimes I talk myself through social situations by asking myself if I want to do it "like Martin or like Malcolm?"

Dr. King's uncle was a local Lansing pastor and Minister Malcolm, of course, grew up in Lansing. A gray-ish day and an unexceptional photograph, but a good reminder of a moment that lifted me up.

Monday, September 19, 2022

start over


Borrowing this picture from TJA who used it as a reminder that we can all start over. 

Things can change...

I know I can grow.

Sunday, September 18, 2022

how do you know

how do you know
the sudden bunny in the trees
a streak of white tail a trail
ringing in the heart 

how do you know
the storm hovering overhead
brooding here, eager to grab
cobwebs and hope

how do you know
the scream waiting in readiness 
to jump out of the darkness
that is my throat 

I don't know 
I wait to reckon with these knots 
with silent prayers to calm
the angry seas inside 

Pic: Nu and At taking off for a walk-and-talk post dinner. Things did not go as I'd hoped. 

yesterday's sunshine

yesterday's sunshine listens to me guessing at laughter or at grief yes, the kids are playing again but no, they've not forgotten ye...