Sunday, September 24, 2023

It is told


I cast stones, follow them down
with my eye
everyone loves a happy ending 

a memory of my father, hand raised
to give me 
a high five or a hug or a wave hello 

the child who seemed irrevocably lost
although only 
in books and movies and video games 

doesn't everyone love a good story?
even when 
it runs off inexplicably like water?

frequently, I myself have taken to bed 
planting crops
in the soft dust of worlds being born
____________________________


Day: I didn't leave the house today. I attended UU online, graded online for hours, read for hours, gardened and walked in the yard for hours, Nu met friends for dinner and was gone for hours, and then R stopped by to give me a massage--for one hour. I think that was the high point of my day. Spent some time being miffed with Big A, and that was the low point. Raced through Jessamine Chan's School for Good Mothers and now am deep into Zadie Smith's The Fraud.

Pic: Max and Huck at sunset yesterday. Golden hour; golden babies.

Saturday, September 23, 2023

company song*

the glasses fall
they bleed their wine 
our stories agree
on paths of memory

we're at last call 
see banter and comfort 
touch everyone
and as we're nearly done 

I thank you, all
you aimed for music 
told the song
of where we may belong 
-----------------

*Note: A ditty Nu helped me make as we put away last night's party. 

Pic: A handsome frog sunning himself at our pond. No kisses or crown needed.

Friday, September 22, 2023

"full hearts, can't lose"

Dinner party at our place this evening. My standing 2:00 pm EPC meeting got canceled, so I happily cooked from 1:30 to 6:00. I made too much food as usual, but was able to send people home with take home boxes. 

Lovely people, terrific conversations, and a happy evening. Nu had requested that they be excused as soon as they'd eaten, but they stayed at the table all evening because they were enjoying themselves. (I guess we teachers know how to talk to young people!)

Pic: Taken by VV, in whose honor this gathering was. While I'm posting just a screenshot here for other people's privacy, everyone looks lovely in it. (Except me--in black at the head of the table with Big A--I was saying "wow" and look hilarious. Ha.) 

Thursday, September 21, 2023

how they grow

My heart grows full. I feel really connected to my classes (ahead of schedule even... usually it's around midterm before I announce how much I love my students to the fam)

An old student announced a major career win on FB, and when I added my congratulations, they thanked me and commented, "your courses and kindness did a lot to shape my goals." That felt so wonderfully validating to hear--a reminder of good things I did in the past and hopefully will again. Also because when I think of this student one of the first things I remember is their kindness and brilliance. 

Pic: Max after he treed a squirrel (Kylo, I think). And just like that (IYKYK), Max looks like a big kid. There's still some puppy in his eyes and that infantilizing (yellow with polka dots!) harness Big A got him, but mostly grown up. 

Wednesday, September 20, 2023

an unfolding

I have been dreaming of people
invisible mountains I exhaled 
into existing

twisting, quickening and though 
short-lived as grass, are seeds 
spiraling in space

are tendrils--of time and desire
opening and expanding
nodding, knowing

a  presence  here to make up for
an absence there, everywhere
the whims of distance 

I... wonder at the un-being before, 
after--the gasp of busy-ness now
marks how life slips by 
---------------------------------------
Note: I did not expect when I started writing that in writing about the space we occupy, I would slip into--and invoke--ideas of galaxies. I think some of this came from dreaming last night--vividly--of people who were important for a season but I may never see again. And I miss Scout so much... my irrational search for him certainly spans every interpretation of "heavens."

Pic: I found this perfect and early autumnal tree in the grocery store parking lot!

Tuesday, September 19, 2023

"as bright as ten million suns"*

Ganesha Chaturthi today (basically, Ganesha's birthday)! I'm not super religious, but I do find joy, peace, and solace in celebrating the rituals I was raised with.

It was a teaching day, so I moved pooja until after work. I always fast on Ganesh Chaturthi until I can break my fast with the pooja offering, so it did mean that I fasted all day. It was extra interesting because I brought pumpkin cake and almond pastries to work to celebrate. 

But I survived hunger (and temptation), came home, made dinner, made a prasad-and-fruit-plate for pooja, had a peaceful pooja, and a nice dinner (and later cuddle) with the fam. 

#AdventuresInPracticingAMinorityReligion. There's a new Michigan bill that would make more minority religious holidays official state holidays. I appreciate how considerate that is, but also, the religious observances in Hinduism are so numerous, I doubt it it'll make more than a dent. Ha.

* Title: I love the sloka that compares the brightness of this god of beginnings to "ten million suns."

Pic: Huck and Max planning to take naps on me. (And yes, we got a third couch for the rumpus room so we can all sprawl a little more.)

Monday, September 18, 2023

bridges

L told me they were building a bike and walking path along the river away from MSU and across from their house at the beginning of the summer. 

And I've loved watching the various little earthmovers and pavers work on this project for a while. 

It's been mostly done for a while now except for the bridge... and this week Big A and I noticed that they have a bridge ready to go. It looks like all they have to do is use that big red crane to position the bridge to span the river. 

Also: It occurred to me yesterday that not spending as much time with L as I usually do (our individual travel plans and illness patterns and work schedules have been bonkers) may also be impacting my sense of wellbeing...  L is the absolute best.

Pic: Construction on the east Red Cedar riverwalk project underway.

It is told

I cast stones, follow them down with my eye everyone loves a happy ending  a memory of my father, hand raised to give me  a high five or a h...