Monday, April 30, 2018
Sunday, April 29, 2018
Saturday, April 28, 2018
Friday, April 27, 2018
Thursday, April 26, 2018
Asifa 2
I could be asleep
but I keep hearing her
hollow with hunger
elegiac from pain
there is the smiling face
there is the stilled corpse
in the same (only?) dress
her silence is my voice
with all its broken bones
the secret, broken seams
dreaming of home, return-
ing to an unbroken body
She knows more than I do
and yet like any child asks
why why why why
why why why why
-
Wednesday, April 25, 2018
Asifa 1
Asifa died in January
it was April when I learned
it is always already too late
We walk alone to the river
to the horse, to our homes
our thoughts catching
on branches of doubt
of light, rupture our
cruel, fool-ish world
Friday, April 13, 2018
Justice for Asifa
I feel a murderous rage coming on. I can't get the story of this child's face out of my head.
My dad was fond of the radical Tamizh poet Bharathiyaar who claimed, “Thani oruvanukku unavillai enil jagathinai azhithiduvom” (If even just one person does not have sustenance, let's burn down the whole world).
And that's how I'm feeling today. No one deserves to be happy, no one deserves to live. Let's just nuke the planet and be done with this.
_
Thursday, April 12, 2018
Bits and Bobs
Last class for this academic year, and our class went downtown to the new frozen custard place. I like joking that it's the closest thing we have to a Sri Lankan restaurant in Alma because its name is Serendipity.
On our way back we bumped into the sweetest, cutest, eight-week old puppy. His name is Yogi. LOOK AT THAT FACE! JUST LOOK! Yogi is a very good boy and trots along happily except when he's turning around to look for all the new friends who give him pets.
Full admission: I saw Yogi for the first time yesterday when I was turning into the parking lot at school, and I totally rolled down my window and screamed, "so cute, SO CUTE!!" I guess I'm practically a TLC song now.
_
On our way back we bumped into the sweetest, cutest, eight-week old puppy. His name is Yogi. LOOK AT THAT FACE! JUST LOOK! Yogi is a very good boy and trots along happily except when he's turning around to look for all the new friends who give him pets.
Full admission: I saw Yogi for the first time yesterday when I was turning into the parking lot at school, and I totally rolled down my window and screamed, "so cute, SO CUTE!!" I guess I'm practically a TLC song now.
_
Wednesday, April 11, 2018
Sweet Meets
'Someone' stopped by my office and claimed that they weren't at all homesick, but lingered for over an hour to just talk, requested a bunch of food from home, told me he missed us ("Not all the time, okay? Just when we're all texting on family chat and stuff"), and even let me take his picture. I'm glad he's not homesick, but am so happy from getting some time with him.
I may have once wished that he'd choose head hair or face hair, but this groomed beard and tiny bun look really nice on him... in a hipster Chewie kind of way.
As he was leaving the English bay, I bumped into Sophfronia Scott who'd come to read for us last term, and whom I'd kept in touch with (via FB mostly). Turns out that she was on her way to a lit festival in Grand Rapids, and stopped over to see us. In an odd way, it feels like we've shared thoughts for a long, long time--it was lovely to see her again, and hang out at the coffeeshop for a while.
_
Tuesday, April 10, 2018
Monday, April 09, 2018
A Monday
This raw and heartbreaking article. I started reading it in the school pickup line--anxious and breathless after the first paragraph.
That poor child. His poor family. The poor women who were gaslighted. But mostly, and over and over... that poor, poor child. In a way, the skeleton of dysfunction was visible for so long--the delayed second book, the frenzied relationships--and yet, this is a necessary speaking up, a necessary fleshing out... even from three decades away.
I was nice to Nu. But Big A knew enough to leave me alone after I growled at him a couple of times. Not like it's his fault--and he's the one who introduced me to Drown all those years ago--but he's used to my anti-patriarchy rages. And I got hugs and talking later. But god, this article. Children deserve so much better.
_
Sunday, April 08, 2018
Here Comes the Sun
when everyone was mocking me
"Sucker's Spring" + "Fake Spring."
But I feel that we're really and truly
on our way to bliss now...
Huckie knows how I feel:
_
Saturday, April 07, 2018
Friday, April 06, 2018
Thursday, April 05, 2018
Wednesday, April 04, 2018
Tuesday, April 03, 2018
Monday, April 02, 2018
Toolbox Chronicles
A long time ago, when At was a kindergartner, he earned a nickname. One of his classmates was describing him to her mom as her new best friend and thought his name was "Toolbox." We laughed and thought it was cute. We've called him that on and off, and he claims it as his YouTube channel name, etc.
So when I saw this cool cooler that shaped like a toolbox, I got it so we could ferry him food from home. Imagine my dismay when I found it was liberally plastered with references to beer. So Nu and I set to work obscuring all the references to beer. I got a Rosie-the-Riveter fan art for feminist cred, Nu blocked out "beer" on another patch so it now reads "I love puppies." Then I filled it with treats and sent it off via grandparents for his Boss Day treat.
So when I saw this cool cooler that shaped like a toolbox, I got it so we could ferry him food from home. Imagine my dismay when I found it was liberally plastered with references to beer. So Nu and I set to work obscuring all the references to beer. I got a Rosie-the-Riveter fan art for feminist cred, Nu blocked out "beer" on another patch so it now reads "I love puppies." Then I filled it with treats and sent it off via grandparents for his Boss Day treat.
Delivery was accomplished and they even took him out for lunch at the pub.
_
Sunday, April 01, 2018
Saturday, March 31, 2018
Friday, March 30, 2018
Earlier this week...
I'm still getting used to just three of us at dinner since At went away to college this year. Well, technically five since we always count Scout and Huck, but they don't sit AT the table, just under it : ). We've had to rearrange our places at the table: Nu now sits at the head with Big A and I on either side. Big A and I used to sit on the same side before.
And sometimes the other side of the table is just too far.
We were sitting across plates of felafel, pita, and sliced salad (the pita was from the store, but I made everything else) and Big A just got this look on his face. "Look at you," he said. "You just take care of everyone. You made Nu breakfast and lunch, then went to teach all day, stopped to take care of your CASA kid before you came home, and then made us all dinner."
And then, Big A and Nu came around to my chair and hugged and kissed me over and over. Puppies too, because they're always one second away from celebrating. I feel incredibly lucky to do what I do with the people I love so much.
_
And sometimes the other side of the table is just too far.
We were sitting across plates of felafel, pita, and sliced salad (the pita was from the store, but I made everything else) and Big A just got this look on his face. "Look at you," he said. "You just take care of everyone. You made Nu breakfast and lunch, then went to teach all day, stopped to take care of your CASA kid before you came home, and then made us all dinner."
And then, Big A and Nu came around to my chair and hugged and kissed me over and over. Puppies too, because they're always one second away from celebrating. I feel incredibly lucky to do what I do with the people I love so much.
_
Thursday, March 29, 2018
Wednesday, March 28, 2018
First Dance!
She said: "It's not the kind where you ask people to dance with you..."
So I guess it must have been the fun kind where everyone got to dance.
I got this picture after Nu came from school...
It reminds me so much of the Nirma ad...
Tuesday, March 27, 2018
"Last Dance with Gorgeous George"

KB's title when she posted this to FB.
I'm lucky to have colleague-friends who crack me up.
And the original.
(My student had dropped her project mannequin off in KB's office
as I was in class. I was moving him to my office, but I didn't realize
that his pants were falling off and thus making me look extra perv.)
_
Monday, March 26, 2018
Sunday, March 25, 2018
Saturday, March 24, 2018
Saturday, March 17, 2018
Friday, March 16, 2018
Thursday, March 15, 2018
Wednesday, March 14, 2018
Reaching Across the Aisle #Enough
Stood in front of the impromptu installation "Reaching Across the Aisle" that students had put up.
Just 17 chairs with the names and ages of the Parkland students on them...
(the two in front are for the parents in the CMU shooting from two weeks ago).
I walked through and began to cry--I was part of a chorus.
They could have been my students someday.
They could be my kids any day.
-
Tuesday, March 13, 2018
On this 13th Day
I couldn't find a black cat to ride with me today,
but I did give Kat Blaque a ride back to her hotel.
It wasn't bad--just a bit awkward after I disagreed with her.
And 15-hour workdays are no fun.
_
Monday, March 12, 2018
Sunday, March 11, 2018
Saturday, March 10, 2018
Mixed
Nu was at her first serious vocal concert yesterday; At was at his first academic conference yesterday. I didn't see either of them in action since I had five students presenting at the Michigan Academy conference and I was trying to be a supportive mentor.
I'm happy my students did such an awesome job and that I was able to be there for them in whatever capacity that made sense in the moment, but I'm a bit blue about missing the kids' big days.
I cannot say enough about how supportive my loves were though.
Nu: You were working, mama. That's important.
At: P (student) is graduating this year, there'll be lots of opportunities to see me give a paper again.
Also, mixed--it was a bit weird being at CMU exactly a week after this happened.
__
I'm happy my students did such an awesome job and that I was able to be there for them in whatever capacity that made sense in the moment, but I'm a bit blue about missing the kids' big days.
I cannot say enough about how supportive my loves were though.
Nu: You were working, mama. That's important.
At: P (student) is graduating this year, there'll be lots of opportunities to see me give a paper again.
Also, mixed--it was a bit weird being at CMU exactly a week after this happened.
__
Friday, March 09, 2018
Thursday, March 08, 2018
Tuesday, March 06, 2018
Sunday, March 04, 2018
Saturday, March 03, 2018
Friday, March 02, 2018
Thursday, March 01, 2018
O no, not again!
I was beginning to get used to temperatures in the 40's. And I guess it wasn't just me. Both Z and I were late to our coffee date this morning because we didn't have our coats on us at school drop off and had to go home to grab them.
And I arrived at Chapelure mad as hell mad as well, after I received some intense criticism feedback from Big A on a piece I'd written... I didn't realize until I read it again that--in my hurry--I'd skipped over the supportive and constructive parts to focus on the corrective comments. There's a message in there. Somewhere.
_
Wednesday, February 28, 2018
Tuesday, February 27, 2018
Saturday, February 24, 2018
Friday, February 23, 2018
Thursday, February 22, 2018
Wednesday, February 21, 2018
#MeToo MMRP

_
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