"I like all cake, silly!"

It's been a tough week (we have no word on our Title IX thing and teaching every weekday is oddly draining although I'm still teaching just three classes). I'd been craving cake (openly--like over dinner and on family chat) and Big A, our resident baker, asked what kind I wanted--to which I responded "I like all cake, silly!"

Today I came home to this beauty--simultaneously hearty and delicate and filled with pistachios and raspberries.

There's an Outside

As reports of our weekend ice storm were greatly exaggerated, I ventured outside and took a long walk (in our backyard). And lo, it was lovely.

If L were here, she'd be making me trudge miles, but I spent at least some time outside despite her absence. (I cannot wait for L to return next week, fingers crossed.)

Anyway, I class prepped, made dinner, cleaned, started and finished Ann Patchett's The Dutch House (which reminded me so much of Jane Eyre--which I'm teaching this week!), drove five mins to get an hour-long massage, and now am fin.

'Tis the season to be

Our local celebrity now has a name! 

The other story that brought me a smile-tear was this Storycorps episode of a meeting between an elementary school music teacher and a cabaret performer fifty years later.

Sunset Strip

Just this yolky mess of gorgeous sunset on my way home,  and I am so, SO happy that the days are getting longer. 

Also, I negotiated for Big A to be in charge of dinner TTR, so I went home to an amazing Brazilian seafood-veggie soup and and a really exquisite pan of pao de quiejo that Nu, Scout, and I were polishing off even before the soup bowls got to the table.

Now I'm going to scrub the news from my head and just enjoy this moment of fullness, blankets, and milk Chocolove. which is really the best chocolate I've ever had. (overwrite what I said before.)

Grateful

Grateful for this thoughtful present from my lovely students, who even accessorized Frida with a "Sisterhood is Powerful" button.

When I brought her home last week, she was sitting next to me on the drive home and when I was stopped at the light, the homeless person I was chatting to asked me if he could have "dolly" for his niece. So not only did I have no money to give him, it must have seemed that I wouldn't give away what must have seemed like a highly age-inappropriate and superfluous knick-knack. He also asked me for pants ("30-inch waist. But not jeans! Dress pants!"), so I'll be trying to get that to him.

(Also, that intersection will always remind me of Adrian--I hope the fact he hasn't been here for months means he got his truck working again and is off on some travels. And also, I still don't have an answer to the question At and Nu have both asked me in toddlerhood--how are people homeless?)

A sense of an ending

I guess I should be relieved the investigators found that the Title IX complaint I'd participated in was more than valid. But reading through the 70+-page report, I relived so much of that nonsense all over again, learned how it was even more awful than I had suspected it was, and am already beginning to dread the hearing and appeals processes that are to follow.

Happy hepatitis, I guess?

I finally managed to get a picture of the happiest hepatitis warning (in the world, probably!). The excitement of that exclamation point! The picture of the virus that looks like party decorations!!

I've lost count of the number of times this sign has made me chuckle at the end of a long day of work and while in the middle of a long and lonely commute.

Reflection

I started the day with this and then the therapist, but I needed more time to just sit with things, be by myself, preparing for the busyness of this week (Thanksgiving) and the next (end of term). And the next (middle of December things) and the next (end/begin the year) and the next (new term things) and on and on. Amen.

RSC (Reduced not Royal)

I took Big A to see the show yesterday. It was so windy on the way there, I almost got Mary Poppins-ed with my umbrella, and we couldn't hear each other even when we yelled (and we yelled), and Big A's scarf tried to fly away. But we got to the Wharton Center mostly ok.

About the show itself, the less said the better. I'm not sure my marriage will recover from Big A's deep disappointment that I picked this show.

Our seats were right by L and T, so we walked back home with them; it was much calmer on the way back, and honestly the nicest part of the evening.

Generous Thinking

Dinner with the author at the President's house this evening, and KB and I kept falling into these patterns where we were flanking--first the fireplace, then the speaker at the dinner table. 

Anyway, it gave me time to quietly thank Fitzpatrick for her solidarity with minorities, and her point that civility does not mean having to argue with people for your humanity.

By the time I got home

By the time I got home
I was worthy of love
I was dressed in hope

your words don't reach
are just not as sharp
I see myself here

I see myself here
not as you see me
not as you say I am

Not according to plan

Big A is still in Denver, so I'd cobbled together some childcare for Nu on my long teaching day. Nu would take the school bus home, walk to L's, help her plant a tree and hang out, and we'd both have dinner at L's before coming home, and collapsing in pajamas for our "sleepover" in the rumpus room with Scout and Huck.

Instead I started receiving texts on family chat from At while I was on my way home telling me that the "sprained" finger I'd asked him to have looked at ten days ago, was actually a dislocated finger, and Dr. H at our family practice couldn't get it to stay in place despite a couple of times of "popping it back" (™) because his muscles and tendons had knitted wrong in the intervening days. Big A told him to go see a colleague of his at the E.R. in Lansing, so that's where we spent the rest of the evening.

It took several tries of Lidocaine and people tugging on his finger (and At making the inevitable fart jokes) before they could get the joint positioned and splinted. It was actually pretty traumatic. There was so much numbing agent that the base of his finger started to bleed, and despite his general good humor and inability to not be a sweet smartassy jokester, it was clear that the pain was getting to be too much. Not to be outdone, I somehow lost my insurance card despite putting it back in my wallet. And Nu having somehow ingested a peanut butter chip in a cupcake earlier, vomited repeatedly--but elegantly--into a plastic bag at the E.R. All in all, we made quite an impression at Big A's work.
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Peak Color

L said she was taking her Californian houseguest on a color tour of Fenton, because we're at peak color right now.

Everywhere is so beautiful, that I was almost late to class this afternoon because I had to keep stopping to take pictures on the way.

I can barely see trees or sky. If I keep looking, I won't think of anything else. We're that golden.


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Color me nostalgic

These trees on the way home from class are quintessentially autumnal, but my south asian mind is bungeeing into spring and childhood, because it's the kind of green touched by yellows, pinks, and oranges, that we'd call  "tender mango leaf."









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For a few moments...

yesterday, after the concert, it was lovely to have At nestled into a corner of the kitchen, flanked by columns of pictures of earlier Ats.

And then it was time for him to drive back to college...

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Meanwhile, while we're still in the garage...

I have yet to start the car to take At back to college, but the ping of Big A's pic to family chat shows that the babies already miss their oldest sib.


The heart knows what it knows.






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Another day, another new view...

Walking to work gives me a lot of time to finesse class as I walk to it, and lots of time on the way back for wayward thoughts.

Such as if I didn't have long hair or breasts, I might run more frequently and further.

Part of this was because I was headed to the radiology office after class to schedule the damn
ultrasound that the family practice ordered. But it's still weird to fake myself into thinking of cancer as a fitness motivator.

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Pause

We're in the car and just a block from school here. I begged Nu and they took a break from torturing me with BTS long enough to take this beautifully composed picture of the sky.

I really like the emphasis of the red traffic lights.

The baby is so talented.












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Here Comes the Sun

I was so delighted to see this bright face over the Maple River.

(In a show of what we used to call
"deep breath of beauty"
when we all had to drive to Alma for school.)

(Also: Kids, please don't try this in your cars.)

A New Way

I usually snake through buildings and alleyways in the general direction of Grand River Road to get to class, and today I came upon this loveliness when I turned some random corner from Farm Lane.

Maps (and recipes) are more notional than instructive for me, so I just hope I can find this park again when I head back in that general direction.




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