There's a lot of yammering about race, class, and gender in most of my classes, but that didn't stop me from being surprised by stuff people I really like have said lately. Friend X and I were talking about some other random stuff when he said:
It bugged me immediately that he would think that
(a) Race: Marrying a white person (like him!) is means of obtaining respect? And we're not talking people who might find me less alien because I happen to be married to one of their own. We're talking about respect from my own parents!
(b) Gender: Marrying "well" is the only way to earn my parents' respect?
I was fuming so I went home and told my mom, who proceeded to unleash the class bomb:
Mortifying.
_
Your parents must respect you because you married a white guy.
It bugged me immediately that he would think that
(a) Race: Marrying a white person (like him!) is means of obtaining respect? And we're not talking people who might find me less alien because I happen to be married to one of their own. We're talking about respect from my own parents!
(b) Gender: Marrying "well" is the only way to earn my parents' respect?
I was fuming so I went home and told my mom, who proceeded to unleash the class bomb:
Nevermind, she said. Forget it. What does he know? He doesn't even have a good education, he's just a shopkeeper.
Mortifying.
_
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