This morning, dropping the kids off at elementary school and preschool, I could feel my hands tightening into claws, throat swelling, voice panicking as I said goodbye.
Violence towards kids--any kid, not just mine--is my trigger for anger, for desperation, suicidal ideation, cold rage, lately—thankfully--for action, but still most frequently for fat, bawly tears. And I know exactly how stupid that sounds.
They have adequate security at both schools (locked doors/ keypad entry), but on NPR they were talking about how you really can’t stop anyone if they’re determined. So I showed up to retrieve the two-year-old hours before her dimissal time. But I’ll be teaching my class tomorrow and won’t be able to. Big A tries to point out the killings are all the way in China.
True. Kids are so small and trusting everywhere. Also true.