Showing posts with label Family Tree. Show all posts
Showing posts with label Family Tree. Show all posts
Wednesday, January 01, 2020
Sunday, December 29, 2019
Secret non family
"My secret family wouldn't do this" was a weird sentence I used to say 6-7 years ago. It was mainly meant for laughs, and the kids knew it was a joke, but it used to make them AND BIG A a little bit sad when said it anyway. And then Big A told a story about how my secret family was a bunch of raccoons and the joke is very firmly on me these days.
They sent me this picture on the family group text while they were off visiting grandparents in Yellow Springs. Haha. SO funny.
I had planned to take a few days to myself while the rest of the fam was gone, and then our furnace died last week, so I had the perfect excuse not to go (had to keep the taps from freezing). My plans were to veg out with Whole Foods carry out and movies with girlfriends and a spa day. But I slipped in the garden and hurt my back and am sitting here hopped up on Advil and hot tea and and feeling a little bit sorry for myself.
They sent me this picture on the family group text while they were off visiting grandparents in Yellow Springs. Haha. SO funny.
I had planned to take a few days to myself while the rest of the fam was gone, and then our furnace died last week, so I had the perfect excuse not to go (had to keep the taps from freezing). My plans were to veg out with Whole Foods carry out and movies with girlfriends and a spa day. But I slipped in the garden and hurt my back and am sitting here hopped up on Advil and hot tea and and feeling a little bit sorry for myself.
Monday, December 23, 2019
The Waiting Game
Back when Big A and his sister were tiny and being pesky and their dad was single parenting and busy, they'd play a game that had one rule and one objective: the player who was silent longest won. I know about this game because Big A tried to institute this game with our kids--perhaps a decade ago-- and failed spectacularly.
I'm not surprised--At and Nu were in charge of the raita today as I juggled the various tasks toward egg-paratha rolls (Big A's Boss Day pick) and every step of the way was chatter, and jokes, and negotiation (if I measure the cumin you should get the salt, I washed the cucumbers so you should wash the tomatoes, and on and on and on and on). I read somewhere that families should support kids learning to advocate and negotiate for themselves, but yesterday... I was torn between chuckling and wanting to shut it down. The smoke alarm going off (as it does every time we fry up more than 10 parathas didn't help).
Still waiting to hear about things at work... but now I have a tower of toffee tea cakes, well watered plants, fully wrapped Christmas presents (not pictured), and a dwindling supply of unrefrigerated fruit to keep me company.
Sunday, November 24, 2019
Wednesday, November 13, 2019
I do declare
Nu (whose finger is in the picture) and I found this Vivek Velanki exhibit by accident. His grandmother, whose passport is the first exhibit is from Madras (like me!).
I recommended it to the poco students at MSU.
Sunday, October 27, 2019
Divali!
I mean I'd strung up the lights already, and Divali was the perfect time to turn them on. It felt like my own version of Kusama, was our trip just last year?
When Nu and I wished my parents in the morning, they seemed a bit sad for us that it would be just the two of us for the biggest holiday of the year (At is at college; Big A is at a conference). But I reminded them that Scout and Huck would be here too, and that seemed to help some.
As it turned out, there was a teensy Divali celebration at UU and then EM came over for dinner bearing sweets from Dusty's--it was a Michigan Divali!
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When Nu and I wished my parents in the morning, they seemed a bit sad for us that it would be just the two of us for the biggest holiday of the year (At is at college; Big A is at a conference). But I reminded them that Scout and Huck would be here too, and that seemed to help some.
As it turned out, there was a teensy Divali celebration at UU and then EM came over for dinner bearing sweets from Dusty's--it was a Michigan Divali!
-
Monday, October 21, 2019
Sunday, August 25, 2019
Wednesday, August 14, 2019
Thursday, June 20, 2019
Sunday, June 16, 2019
His Two Parrots
My dad always calls my sister Rama Chilaka [Green Parrot] and me Pancha Varna Chilaka [Multicolored/Five-colored Parrot]. Chilaka is a used as a term of affection in Telugu, but because it's my dad, he made it so highly specific.
I found these finger puppets (at Whole Foods of all places!) a few weeks ago and I saved them to wish my dad a happy father's day.
I actually didn't get to talk to him for very long--he greeted, marveled, loved, kissed, and blessed me in about 15 seconds because the India-Pakistan cricket match was on 😂.
_
Sunday, March 10, 2019
Monday, January 14, 2019
January
I keep on feeling my thoughts
You too?
It's a knife--
in the shape of a puffy heart.
*
My child is grandmother's.
Her child,
my mother--
serenades every sunrise.
*
I sit here, the sun sets too
an earthling,
lost on earth,
feeling the slide of inertia
_
Thursday, December 20, 2018
In the Old World
I am to reread their wrinkles
search their weeds for memories
even as ancestors' eyes are forced
to close, go masked, invisible.
It will make sense
until you ask about it.
*
They want to open my mind
wrest, twist it wide
then tip it like the overfilled point
of a plate, at the moment when
you're suddenly sated,
free of the desire for it.
*
I mime their scolding for I have no will,
and I am meek. Still they are forgotten
even so, every time--memory by memory
in a language my children will never speak
Aiyo--to think I meant at the start
to hold and shape love
as it pooled its fast and fluid
escape in my heart.
****
search their weeds for memories
even as ancestors' eyes are forced
to close, go masked, invisible.
It will make sense
until you ask about it.
*
They want to open my mind
wrest, twist it wide
then tip it like the overfilled point
of a plate, at the moment when
you're suddenly sated,
free of the desire for it.
*
I mime their scolding for I have no will,
and I am meek. Still they are forgotten
even so, every time--memory by memory
in a language my children will never speak
Aiyo--to think I meant at the start
to hold and shape love
as it pooled its fast and fluid
escape in my heart.
****
Tuesday, October 16, 2018
In Autumn
My hands are birds praying
in time to heart beat, my feet.
Fingers flying across the open
face of my phone, I am looking
for you in a midwestern town
where you have never lived
I am looking for my father
I am looking at my father
I am writing our name in pain
even as the pen runs dry, dies
-------------------------------------------------------
*This was supposed to be a picture of autumn tones in Bakersfield Park, but my phone died as I tried to take a picture. As best as I can tell, it died... from the cold? Apparently winter is coming for more than just tropical me.
in time to heart beat, my feet.
Fingers flying across the open
face of my phone, I am looking
for you in a midwestern town
where you have never lived
I am looking for my father
I am looking at my father
I am writing our name in pain
even as the pen runs dry, dies
-------------------------------------------------------
*This was supposed to be a picture of autumn tones in Bakersfield Park, but my phone died as I tried to take a picture. As best as I can tell, it died... from the cold? Apparently winter is coming for more than just tropical me.
Tuesday, October 09, 2018
à°¤ెà°²ుà°—ు
yes, of course, this is
merely the lisp of lips,
a slip, not apocalypse--
only the clumsy glamor
of Telugu scripting round
tripping slow, deliberate.
Daughter to my mother
and to mother's mother
whose words were fated
to immigrate too. I am
stuttering, I hear kinship
knocking, coming on in.
_
merely the lisp of lips,
a slip, not apocalypse--
only the clumsy glamor
of Telugu scripting round
tripping slow, deliberate.
Daughter to my mother
and to mother's mother
whose words were fated
to immigrate too. I am
knocking, coming on in.
_
Thursday, August 02, 2018
Tuesday, July 31, 2018
Saturday, July 14, 2018
Babama and Baby NuNu
Recently, I did a meditation that asked me to remember the oldest person (Babama, my great grandmother) and the youngest person (Baby NuNu) I had loved. If they could have a conversation with each other, what would they learn? How would I introduce them? I was in tears then because they would never meet each other as Babama died before my babies were born.
But I was reminded that some things live on. Nu lost her screen privileges this week, and when I was telling Big A about why she had lost them, he reminded me of Babama's principle. Basically, if you enable people to cheat (by leaving valuables around, or being lax about people copying off you, etc.) you are responsible for the crime--not the unfortunates who are compelled by their circumstances to steal, copy, lie etc.
When I trace the timeline of this piece of advice through the generations and geographies it has traveled, it's basically a study of how love connects us.
Now for that difficult conversation with the 10-year-old.
_
But I was reminded that some things live on. Nu lost her screen privileges this week, and when I was telling Big A about why she had lost them, he reminded me of Babama's principle. Basically, if you enable people to cheat (by leaving valuables around, or being lax about people copying off you, etc.) you are responsible for the crime--not the unfortunates who are compelled by their circumstances to steal, copy, lie etc.
When I trace the timeline of this piece of advice through the generations and geographies it has traveled, it's basically a study of how love connects us.
Now for that difficult conversation with the 10-year-old.
_
Thursday, July 05, 2018
Life's Beach-y
It was so hot at the beach today...
Kirk Park Beach allows doggies off-leash,
but Scout Akshaya and Huck Amulya
were a bit skittish and stayed close to mama.
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"I'm a weirdo/doofus/nerd/naif" (Part MXVIII)
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